a letter to my enemy

I am supposed to love you
you are a complex & wounded
human being
but loving you is
really a question of cost
what will it cost my heart
to turn towards you
if I remain cold, I am protected
if I maintain distance, those I love are safe
if I love you only in hopes
that you will change
that is not love

as I write this I realize
that I am afraid that
I will actually love you
because
humans are so
beautiful and
messy and
sympathetic and
promising
and loving you means
forgiveness and humility
unclenching my fists
dousing my fury
loving you means
a cool stream and fresh rain
on the burning wasteland of my hatred

so, susanna, I choose to love you
now you must carry on and
pass the love forward
to others who are
hard to love

3.7.18